I am soooo torn. As a fat person, the LAST thing I ever wanted was advice from people. I didn’t want to hear that I needed to lose weight. I didn’t want to see what other people were doing to get healthy. I certainly didn’t want to hear that I needed to eat less. But now, as someone who has dropped almost 150 pounds, I so badly want to help others! To tell people how amazing the other side is! You guys, I played tag with my youngest kid on the playground at the park yesterday. Like chased her and ran from her and climbed the rope dome. And I bawled like a baby at one point when she hugged me and told me she was so happy I was playing with her. Tears of happiness that I can play with her now. Tears of sadness and regret as I thought about the last almost 8 years of not being able to play with her. All the time that I’ve lost!
But, I digress. As I walk through this world and I see all the heavy, hurting, unhealthy people I want to shout from the mountaintops how great this is! How amazing I feel! How I love the feeling of my muscles working. I love the rumble of my stomach that tells me I’m hungry. When I was fatter that didn’t happen. I never got to a hungry phase. I love seeing my thigh muscles bulging under my workout leggings. I love staring at my plate and see how healthy I eat.
Is my journey easy? Not by any means! It’s hard! Every day is a struggle to eat right and exercise. I ate a Reese’s Big Cup yesterday. Don’t even like them. But it was delightful yesterday. And then? I literally stomped my feet and cried when I came home from a long day and a kickboxing class and I still needed 4,000 steps to my step goal for the day. I didn’t care. I was not getting on that treadmill. Every day is a struggle. But I keep moving. One foot in front of the other. Sometimes it’s one step forward and two steps back. But all those steps count!
I just want people to see how worth it the struggle is! I want to help people take care of themselves and get stronger and healthier and live!! But, I hesitate. I remember what it was like to be on the heavy side. I remember the guilt and shame. I remember how offended I would be if someone said something, anything about my weight. So I stay quiet.
The same goes for the spiritual side. I am a Christian. I have faith in God as my Father and protector. I believe that God sent His one and only Son to suffer and die for my sins. That because of His sacrifice and because I believe in Him, I will be with Him in heaven when my time on earth is through. And it’s hard to me to keep quiet because the blessings that are part of the package deal are amazing and so worth it! The relationship that I have with my Heavenly Father is what gets me through even my darkest days! I cannot imagine going through the life I have gone through without my faith and my Father.
Is being a Christian easy? Not at all! Once you sign on to being a follower of Christ, the real battles begin. You have signed your name to the Lord’s team roster and Satan wants none of that. He wants to win you over and the battle begins. Fiery darts fly towards you. Trials and tribulations intensify. Satan doesn’t let go easily. You will go through an intense war in your faith walk. Every day can be a struggle. I am in a constant tug of war between the grasp of my Father in Heaven, and the evil and darkness that wishes to drag me under.
But, again, I want people to see how worth it the struggle is! The spiritual growing pains are all worth it when you know that following your Lord and Savior leads you to eternal redemption. But I hesitate with sharing this part too. So many people are anti-God. They don’t want to hear it. How can I believe that nonsense? What good does your imaginary God do? So I stay quiet.
But, I can’t stay quiet! On the physical side or the spiritual side! I’m not going to approach you and tell you “You’re unhealthy! You’re overweight! You need help!” Because that wouldn’t do any good at all! If that had happened to me earlier in my weight loss journey, you’d find me in the McDonalds drive through ordering four Big Mac sandwiches and fries with a Diet Coke. I would be hurt and ashamed and sad and angry. But, I can’t stay quiet! Life is so different, so much better, so much richer when you are healthy and eat better and take care of your body. There are so many more things you can do when you take care of yourself. Will it be tough? Yup! But so so worth it! I ain’t settlin’! You shouldn’t either!
I can’t stay quiet about the spiritual side either! I’m not going to come up and thump you over the head with my Bible. Tell you you’re going to hell if you don’t believe. Convince you to join my church. Because that wouldn’t do any good either! If that had happened in some of my lowest times where my faith wavered, I probably would have pushed you away. Been angry. And never stepped foot in a church again. But, I can’t stay quiet! Life is so different, so much better, so much richer when you invite the Lord Jesus Christ into your heart! There are so many plans that our God has for you! There are so many areas of your life that He would like to help and heal. Will it be tough? Yup! But so so worth it! I ain’t settlin’! You shouldn’t either!
So, if you are reading this, and wondering how you start your physical journey to health and wellness, I am not an expert. I am just a person who has struggled and had a hard time with their weight. And right now, things are clicking for me and I am working hard. And I want to help, to show you how much hope there is in working hard and losing weight and making good choices with diet and exercise. I want to share! If you want to talk about it, I’m here!
And if you’re reading this and you’re wondering how you can accept Christ as your Savior, I am not an expert. I am just a sinner who struggled everyday with choices I make in life, but who has asked Jesus to come into my heart and my life and work in me and through me to share His word. And I want to help, to show you how much hope there is in putting your faith in God and knowing that He is with you always. I want to share! If you want to talk about it, I’m here!
Physically or spiritually! I ain’t settlin’! There is a full, amazing, wonderful life out there! And I want to help you experience the best that’s available! Don’t settle!!! Reach out to me! I would love to share my journey with you! It’s hard! But oh so worth it!
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